Adapt
by Miss Mungoe
Summary: She has always made the best of her surroundings, yet her new form...takes some time getting used to. – Razer/Aya, set after 'Dark Matter'.
1. breathe, and repeat

AN: I hadn't anticipated the obsession GLTAS would become when I first started watching it, let alone how hard I would end up shipping Razer/Aya. Alas, here I am, swimming in a sea of inspiration for a pairing so darn perfect I don't know what to do with myself.

This is inspired by the Lazarus Project in Mass Effect 2, and I've taken some liberties, as I am liable to do when given the chance. Set some time after the end of 'Dark Matter', when Razer goes in search for Aya.

Disclaimer: I do not own Green Lantern: The Animated Series or its characters.

* * *

**Adapt**

**by Miss Mungoe **

"_No being as adaptable and resourceful as she could truly be deleted from existence." _

– _Razer, 'Dark Matter'_

Her first awareness upon waking was of cool air brushing against her cheeks.

Odd. She knew the reactions of her artificial skin to the elements of various planets and atmospheres like she knew her own circuitry – _like the back of my hand_, as Hal Jordan would say – but there was nothing recognizable about the new sensation.

What followed immediately after was a strange sort of tingling, akin to the static she would feel when coming into contact with a power ring, and her fingers twitched in automatic response, closing against the palms of her hands–

–wait, _palms_?

The thought materialised at the same moment her eyes fluttered open, and she felt her brows furrow in confusion. But it was not with the familiar shift of her artificial fibres – she could _feel_ it this time; every twitch, every movement, no matter how minuscule. _Muscles,_ she realized with a start, and shock raced through her with enough force to make her breath catch in her throat–

_Breath. _

A hand flew to her neck before she knew what she was doing, and she frantically palmed the skin of her throat with a fascination brimming with panic. For it was not the synthetic texture of her robotic skin beneath her strange, new fingers; not the skin she _knew,_ the one that was her own. No, this was something else. Uneven, flawed, warm skin. _Organic_, her mind supplied through the haze. Not artificial; not cool and smooth and _perfect_.

And then she felt it, jumping against her hand, pushing against the skin of her throat – _a_ _pulse – _and right at its heels the foreign sensation of something within the confines of her chest _expanding– _

A wheezing sound tore from her lips at the realization, but she was unable to process what she was discovering. Her mind reeled violently, and she clenched her eyes shut at the alien pain directly behind her brow, as though her mind had suddenly become too large for the shell of her skull.

"Ah. You are awake."

The voice drifted past her confusion, registering despite the haze of her thoughts, and she started, not having realized she was not alone. Something was wrong with her scanning system; she had not detected the presence. _Disconcerting._ Her vision struggled to adjust to the light of the room, and her gaze shifted to where the voice had come from, but the action required more effort than she was used to, and she strained her eyes against the glare. Her vision wasn't nearly as sharp as it should be, and now that her senses were slowly coming back, she realized something else. The steady hum of her surroundings that was a constant companion – the breath of every being in her vicinity and the _thump-thump_ of their hearts – it was all...gone. What was left was a quiet so deafening she did know what to make of it, and she almost felt like screaming at the hollow feeling it left within her.

"Do not worry – you will get used to it. Breathe."

There was a hand on her forehead, and warmth spread from the touch, seeping through her skin. Aya gasped for air, and panic welled up within her when she realized she didn't know how to _keep breathing–_

"Relax. Let it come naturally – breathing does not require control. It is an unconscious action, like the beat of your heart."

_...heart? _

"I–" she choked, and coughed. That, too, was alien, and decidedly uncomfortable. Her throat burned as air forced its way out, and she could feel moisture as it welled up in the corners of her eyes. She had no control of her own form; it was like she was just a visitor, trapped in confines that moved without her permission.

"Your vocal chords will also take some getting used to, I imagine," the voice hummed from above her. Not unkindly, but it did little to soothe her steadily rising panic.

"I–I do not–" she croaked weakly.

A face materialised before her then; clear, yet still not as clear as it should be. She could not see the finer details of the features before her; the minuscule lines of age and worry and humour marring the skin, or the hundred different shades of the eyes looking down at her. All she could make out was vague worry-lines, and if asked all she could have said about the eyes would be that they were dark. Nothing more.

A smile stretched across the face then. "Do not strain yourself. You will become used to your new vision soon enough."

"My new...vision?" Her voice felt odd. _Sounded_ odd. Flawed. Not like the voice of an AI; artificial, perfect. No, it sounded more like...more like...

The creature nodded, and through her muddled thoughts she could make out that it was a female. Not human, but of a similar species. She had seen such a species before...but when...? "Yes. Like the rest of your form. It is not as advanced as your former shell, but I believe you will find it a more...suitable host for your mind. A robotic frame can only do so much for a living soul, after all."

Aya tried to will her form to move, the same way she was used to, but it would not work. Her awareness of herself was growing with every passing second, and the panic that had risen in her grew along with her new senses.

"_Relax_. Take your time. It's all about instinct, really, this shape. You will not be in control of everything, as you are no doubt used to. Calm yourself, and let go. _Breathe_."

"Who–" she stopped, her voice breaking with the unfamiliar action of speaking, and her teeth clamped down on her lower lip in surprise. She hissed as pain blossomed at the corner of her mouth, and her hand shot up to cover the searing spot before she could even register the action. When she pulled it back, her eyes widened at the red marring her fingertips. "_What_–" she croaked, disbelieving. _Blood? _

"Ah, yes, I assume this will be your biggest obstacle. It's an unfortunate side-effect of having an organic form, but then–"

The soft drone of the voice became a steady hum in her ears as she stared dumbly at her fingertip and the bright red of the blood marring it. Blood. She _bled_. Like a...like a...

_An organic life-form. _

Her breath hitched in her throat, and she made a sound she hadn't thought she'd ever be capable of making – a choking sort of gasp, produced only by beings with _lungs_ and vocal chords, and...and...

The face appeared before her again, and the dark, bottomless eyes were smiling and kind. "I apologize; I got ahead of myself. I should have introduced myself earlier. My name is Na'ane. Pleased to make your acquaintance at last, Aya."

Aya did not know how to respond to that, or how to process what she was being told. Now that she thought about it, she had no clue how to react at all, and the sensation of utter helplessness was so startlingly unfamiliar she felt like she'd been left, floating alone in deep space with no tether to keep her rooted and safe. Something stirred within her – _in the pit of my stomach_, she remembered how Kilowog had once phrased it – and she felt as if something was pushing its way up her throat, and clamped a hand over her mouth to keep it from escaping. The feeling was too overpowering, however, but before she could think about what she was doing her chest heaved violently, making her buckle over, collapsing in on herself. Yet nothing happened; nothing spilled out but dry air, but the pain was no less fierce than if she should have forcibly ejected her own circuitry.

A warm hand rubbed at her back as she heaved again, and tears sprang to her eyes, rolling down her cheeks and dripping onto the white fabric covering her. She wanted it to _stop_, but she could not command her limbs; foreign parts of a form she had no clue how to come to terms with, let alone control. Her chest burned and her throat hurt, and having been used to only a limited set of senses, the countless new ones that were presenting themselves one after the other were threatening to undo her.

When she finally stopped heaving, her blurred vision focused on the first thing they found before her; her legs and her feet, naked and stretched out before her on the slab of metal on which she was sitting.

_Toes_...?

"Do you like them?"

It took her a moment to realize she had spoken the word aloud, and Aya felt her cheeks flare with heat as a strange feeling raced through her, and one of her hands came up to touch the skin of her face, marvelling at the sudden, unexplainable rise in temperature. Beside her, Na'ane laughed, and Aya shifted her gaze to her, and the wide grin on her face.

"As I said; it will take some time getting used to. However, I hope it is to your liking," she said once her laughter had subsided.

"What...what have you done?" Speaking was an effort, but she attempted it to the best of her ability. The evidence was clear before her eyes – her _new_ eyes – but still the truth refused to register. For once, Aya could not comprehend. Could not analyze and process. She felt _useless_.

Na'ane stepped up before her, and nodded to where she was sitting, disbelieving in a form that was not her own, hands shaking in her lap and her mind reeling to take in everything that was happening. "I salvaged your soul from being destroyed, and ever since I have worked on giving you a new form to inhabit. It has not been easy, but then I have never been one to back down from a challenge. And I proved successful, did I not?"

Aya looked down at herself again, and at the trembling hands in her lap. Ten fingers. Ten toes on her small, bare feet. Legs, smooth and slim, thighs and well-rounded hips. All feminine, and all reminiscent of her old shell. _Reminiscent,_ but not the same. Smooth and soft and tinted green, but nothing like robotic material.

_Organic matter._

Her head shifted, and the feel of something brushing against her jaw sprang to her mind, and she frowned. Before she knew what she was doing, her hands were on her head, tangling in–

_Hair?_

She ran her fingers through it, disbelieving, _this_ more than anything else. Vanity had never been a priority or an obsession, though the concept had long fascinated her, and she had often wondered about the strange addition to the forms of some organic lifeforms, like the earthlings. The texture was soft but unfamiliar, like everything else about her new body. It brushed against her jawline, and when she moved her head, some of it fell into her line of vision. White, she noticed. Hair. _She had hair.  
_

Something bubbled up within her as realization finally dawned, and she nearly choked, because she recognized _this_ feeling. She'd felt it before, though that had been in a different situation; a different place. But it was familiar, and oddly enough, it felt almost...natural, in the confines of her new form. It did not feel foreign, as it had in her robotic shell; this burst of sudden _emotion_.

Happiness.

She looked up at the being standing above her, and noted for the first time the familiar violet uniform, and the power ring covering the middle finger of her right hand. A Star Sapphire, but...why? Had they not condemned her very existence? Why would one of them bring her back?

"Why have you done this?"

Na'ane smiled secretly. "It was done in the name of the power I serve, but mostly...it was as a service to a friend," she said, and left it at that, crossing her arms over her chest in a manner Aya had seen Razer do when unwilling to discuss a matter further.

Aya shifted in her seat, brows pulling down in a frown. "I do not understand." The power she served? Had they not told her her existence defied the very essence of that power? That machines could not love and were thus abominations? She could not process the contradiction before her, and her head hurt – yet another unfamiliar effect of her new form. Never had she felt like this when faced with a conundrum.

"It does not matter overly much," the Star Sapphire said with a shrug. "What matters is that you are alive."

_Alive. _

_Aya, you are _**_alive_**_. _

_Aya–!_

With measured movements, she shifted her legs, sliding them until they dangled off the slab beneath her. The voice in her head pushed through her muddled thoughts; the caress of the syllables of her name so achingly familiar in an existence where she recognized nothing, that she grasped onto it with what little control she had of her own mind.

_Razer. _

What had happened to him? To _her_? She had...the virus. She had designed the virus to eliminate herself; she had not made any mistakes, surely? She had died; her soul, along with her physical form. Dissolved. There had been nothing to upload; she had been tainted, _doomed. _

_I salvaged your soul from being destroyed, and ever since I have worked on giving you a new form. _

_..._**_new form_**_..._

A thousand queries passed through her mind. How had she been saved? How, amongst the deletion of every trace of the Aya Program, had she – the very _core_ – been 'salvaged'?

Yet that was not her main concern, as much as it confused her, as another query pushed its way to the forefront of her mind, along with another surge of panic. "To...to what purpose have you...resurrected me?" Her voice was wary as she spoke, and her fingers twitched as she anticipated the answer. Was this some ploy to take up the mission she had stopped herself from completing? Had her efforts in destroying herself failed? _Razer–_

The Sapphire surprised her then by bursting into laughter, and a stray memory of Hal Jordan's unpredictable nature popped into her mind, momentarily distracting her from her previous concern. "Ressurected, hmm? An appropriate term," Na'ane hummed, visibly amused. "Purpose, you say? I should not be surprised you will not let it drop; you are as inquisitive as I was told you would be."

Aya ignored for the moment the Sapphire's allusion to having heard about her, and focused instead on her initial query. "Your _purpose,_" she stressed. She lifted one of her hands in front of her, as if to emphasise her point. Turning it over, she let her gaze rest on the fingers; the elegant shape of her hand, the dipping palm and the slim wrist that had once been pure robotic material. Turning it again, she caught the shift of something beneath the skin, and it was physically hard to tear her eyes away.

"Why?" she asked again, unable to emphasise the sheer extent of her confusion any better.

Na'ane shrugged. "The answer is not half as complicated as what you are no doubt imagining," she said, contrary to the fact that Aya could not comprehend it even if she tried. All she had learned about the Star Sapphires was in direct opposition to what she was being told, after all. So she said nothing, but her silence seemed only to amuse her companion, and Na'ane tilted her head with another smile. "My purpose, as you phrased it, has little to do with the galaxy, or even myself personally. I am simply a mediator. Nothing more, nothing less. My purpose is, and has been for some time now, _you_."

Aya blinked, the words registering, but not processing. "Me?"

She grinned. "Yes. _You._ And your life."

"I do not understand. Please explain."

The Sapphire sighed, and shook her head, though her perceived exasperation was contradicted by the smile stretching across her face. She said nothing, though, but reached for Aya's hand, and tugged her forward before she could move out of her reach.

The cold that shot through her as her feet hit the floor made her hiss, and she wobbled a bit in her step, catching herself on the edge of the metal slab to keep herself upright. Her free hand was still caught in the Sapphire's, and Na'ane kept her steady as she wavered. Still, the strange matronly being said nothing, and tentatively Aya wiggled her toes against the floor beneath her, feeling the fine points of her new feet as she shifted her weight experimentally.

Meeting her gaze, Na'ane nodded to something to her right, and Aya followed her gaze, taking a measured step away from the slab as she did so, but her legs buckled beneath her almost immediately. She would have fallen if not for the hands catching her, and Na'ane lifted her back to her feet without another word. It did not feel all at like walking had used to feel like, and the more she thought about the movements of her bones and the muscles in her legs, the more complicated it became. So she tried to do as she had been told – to let go, and go by instinct, although how to do_that_ seemed even harder to grasp.

The hands below her elbows kept her steady as she wavered, and when she raised her gaze, she found what the Sapphire had tried to show her – a mirror. The reflection thrown back at her had her stopping completely in her tracks, and her previous focus at rediscovering how to walk was pushed almost forcefully to the back of her mind in light of her newest discovery.

It was not what she had expected, if she had expected anything at all. It was not the sight she had gotten used to, after she had first taken a physical form. Yet it was her – there was no doubt about that. The shape of her nose, the arch of her brows, the line of her jaw. Though borrowed from another's image, it was still all _her – _it was still Aya. Rooted to the spot, she met her own eyes in the reflective surface; blue, as she remembered. Familiar, where everything else was new, but yet not the _same_.

One of the hands holding her upright landed on her shoulder; the warmth seeping through the skin startling enough to pull her from her near trance, and she realized with another start that she was standing on her own. Na'ane smiled, meeting her gaze in the mirror, and her grin was decidedly triumphant.

Aya found she could not breathe.

"Happy Birthday, _Aya_."

* * *

AN: Because I really wanted to explore an event in which Aya was given an organic form, and the consequences of this. I imagine she's not the only one who would struggle to get used to it, and that opens up for a lot of interesting possibilities. All the hows and whys will be explained in due time, of course, but in the mean time just bear with me. Feedback is much appreciated!


	2. carry your cross

AN: Two chapters in the span of one day, why the heck not. The positive feedback has more than encouraged me to continue, and as my inspiration for these two is currently running at full power, the second chapter practically wrote itself. A huge thank-you to those of you who've read and reviewed! Please enjoy the second instalment, in which Aya is not the only one to make new discoveries.

Disclaimer: I do not own Green Lantern: The Animated Series or its characters.

* * *

"Artificial?"

Na'ane nodded, and Aya looked down at her hands again, and the shifting bones beneath her skin. She was seated back on the slab, as her previous attempts at walking had drained much of the strength she was still getting accustomed to, and now that she was fully alert she had come to discover that she was on Zamaron. Although, going by the violet tint to everything around her, she should have known it could not be anywhere else.

She turned her hand over again until she could see the back of it, and watched the bones shift with mesmerized attention. Her brows furrowed – an action that had almost become second-nature now, less than an hour after she'd discovered it – as she contemplated Na'ane's earlier words. "How is that possible?" She raised her gaze back up, meeting that of the older female.

The Star Sapphire smiled. "Well, we could not put you into someone else's body, could we? It had to be created. And as you no doubt noticed, we have used your old form as a model. I hope that was alright."

"And..._you_ did this?"

Na'ane nodded again, pride evident in her stance and the tone of her voice. "I did. You doubt my word?"

Aya trailed a tentative fingertip over the expanse of skin covering her wrist, deeply contemplative. Though her words rang true, it all seemed too...perfect to be the mere creation of science. Was a Star Sapphire truly behind this? "It seems...unlikely...in light of my data on the Star Sapphires." She met Na'ane's gaze with her own curious one. "Your people are no scientists."

The Sapphire barked a laugh. "Oh, child! Such a black-and-white view of the galaxy you have." She shook her head, as though amused.

Aya frowned. "Black and white? Please explain."

The Sapphire sighed. "It is a figure of speech. What I meant is that things are not always in accordance with your 'data'. We might not all be scientists, but we are not all the same, regardless. What binds us together is the power that we pledge ourselves to, but I assure you were are quite different beings on the whole." She quirked a smile. "The Guardians are not the only ones hiding secrets in this universe."

Aya looked down at her hands again, still mesmerized by the fine details, from the blunt nails of her fingers to the vague lines etched in her soft-skinned palms. "You have been...thorough."

"That's a very clinical way of putting it. I do nothing by halves, least of all when someone's life is concerned." Her tone was lightly chiding, Aya realized with a start.

"I apologize. I did not mean–"

"I know," Na'ane cut her off with another smile. "You have much to learn, yet, of the ways of the universe. Hopefully your new body will prove helpful in your growth."

Aya said nothing, but shifted her legs, and looked at her toes, all ten of them, as she had grown fond of doing since her discovery of them. They were so different from what she'd been used to, but she wondered if they would be quite as helpful as the Sapphire proposed. She could not fly like this, for one. And she had none of her former strength in this form.

But there were other possibilities her new body offered that her robotic shell had not possessed – the thought slithered in, cutting smoothly through the doubt clouding her mind. No longer attached to mechanical parts, her fingers were as flexible as any earthling's, and she could rotate her wrists in a delightfully amusing manner.

A stray memory passed before her mind's eye, of a red-gloved hand catching her own, and of fingers curling around her awkwardly shaped robotic appendage in a way she was never able to successfully duplicate.

That strange heat rose below the skin of her cheeks as she considered the new possibility before her; to be able to properly hold his hand, like she had seen done between mates in so many different species and cultures. It seemed almost an universal sign of affection for those possessing such appendages, and delight rose within her at the prospect of her improved form. Other than her hair and her feet, her new hands were what fascinated her most, and she'd spent much of her time since waking just studying her fingers, and the simple commands it took to make them flex and relax.

When she raised her gaze back up, the Star Sapphire was watching her with an amused expression on her face. Aya let her hands fall back into her lap, and tilted her head to the side. "You said before...this was a service to a friend? Bringing me back."

Na'ane smiled. "Your memory does you justice, though I expected nothing less. Yes, it was...a favour of sorts."

Aya frowned, and Na'ane laughed, and before she could react, a slim finger had reached out, tracing the path running from the point between her brows and down the bridge of her nose. "If you keep doing that, you will have some very visible wrinkles before you know it. Remember, you will age with this form, and it will mould itself after your treatment of it. It might be artificial skin and tissue, but it functions the same as that of any organic life-form. Keep that in mind."

Aya tried to smooth her brow, but did not let on how much the prospect of worry-lines _pleased_ her. She had often studied the expressions of her companions – the laugh-lines on the corners of Hal Jordan's mouth, and the harsh lines etched between Razer's brows that betrayed his thoughts more than his words ever did – and she had often wondered what it would be like to carry such blatant evidence of _living_. Her old face had been perfectly smooth, free of wrinkles and scars, but her new one...it felt more _hers_ than her old face ever had. Whatever lines she achieved would be testaments of her own thoughts; her concerns and her joys. Her scars would be uniquely hers as well; memories of her adventures and her choices, and of accidents and sacrifices. If anything had ever made her feel truly alive_,_ it was _this;_ the sudden prospect of her new-found mortality.

"You look pleased."

Aya smiled, and found she liked the slight tug of her facial muscles, and let the corners of her mouth stretch as far as they could. "I am happy. Thank you...Na'ane. This..."

The Sapphire waved her off. "Think nothing of it. Like I said; it was a favour to a friend, though I must admit I am _curious..."_ she trailed off, and an odd smile stretched across her face.

"This friend," Aya began. "Is–"

"Someone with your best interests at heart. Or should I perhaps say, the interests of your beloved."

Aya felt her heart do an odd sort of _jump_ within her chest, and started. One of her hands shot up to cover the spot, and she wondered not without a small surge of worry if something was wrong with her new body, but pushed the thought away in favour of the one Na'ane had brought to mind. "Razer?"

Na'ane nodded. "So I was told. I did not have the chance to meet him, when he was last at Zamaron, but I have heard a great deal about him. The Red Lantern who gave his heart to a robot. It has become quite the legend amongst our people."

Aya felt herself blush – _that_ was the word she'd been scouring her mind for! – at what the Sapphire suggested. Yet through her embarrassment, a question pushed its way to the forefront of her mind, and her brows furrowed. "Wait. How do you know of his feelings?" In all her time spent trying to decipher the stoic Lantern, Aya's main discovery had been that he did not share anything unless forced to, and sometimes not even then. She knew of none who kept their thoughts as close to their heart as Razer. That he should have shared his feelings with the inhabitants of Zamaron...it was just not in accordance with the conclusions she had drawn from his character and behaviour.

Na'ane raised a brow. "We are servants of love, child. Do you not think we can sense it in others? Not to mention, he caused quite the stir when he requested one of the Queen's portals to get to _you_. It is common knowledge on Zamaron what it takes for such a transportation to work."

"True love," Aya murmured, almost without realizing it.

Na'ane smiled. "Indeed. Now _that_ caused quite the commotion. One cannot fool the Queen's power; his emotions were genuine. _You,_ however, remained an enigma to us all. A machine who earned the love of a living being. It was inconceivable."

Aya's hands fidgeted in her lap, and she shifted in her seat. "You do not sound certain of that admission." In fact, she sounded rather mocking.

Na'ane chuckled. "Oh, I _was_. I assure you, I was as certain as the Queen herself that there was something to which we were not privy. One does not fall in love with _machines–_" Aya flinched.

"–but it was not until a meeting with Green Lantern Hal Jordan that I learned the truth of your existence."

_You are alive, Aya! _

"You were never just an AI, though how could we have known? Your actions during your siege of our world did little to convince us otherwise."

Aya tried to ignore the strange surge Na'ane's words caused within her; like the bottom of her stomach had suddenly fallen out, though how that was possible in an organic body, she did not know. Instead, she focused on the Sapphire's previous revelation. "Hal Jordan told you. Why?"

Na'ane shrugged. "My guess is as good as any, child. To clear your name, perhaps? He has been diligent in sharing the truth of your existence and your actions since your untimely death. I believe it did not sit well with him to have one of his companions treated like an enemy after her demise, especially in light of her sacrifice."

Aya shifted her gaze to the hands resting in her lap. "Hal Jordan...never ceases to surprise."

"No, he does not," Na'ane said with a brusque laugh. "He is one of a kind, that is certain. Upon meeting him, it was not difficult to see how he so easily won my daughter's heart and affection."

Aya looked up at that. "Daughter?"

Na'ane's smile was strained. "You might have met her. Her name was Ghia'ta."

A face flashed before Aya's eyes, of pretty blue eyes and an easy smile, and she tensed in her seat. No, she remembered well enough, and going by the look on Na'ane's face, she was more than aware of this. "I...I am sorry."

The grave expression gave way to a sudden smile, like sunshine breaking through an overcast sky. "Don't be. She gave her life for love; a nobler sacrifice I cannot imagine for a Star Sapphire. It was...unfortunate, but thus is the price for loving someone. You are not new to this, from what I have heard."

Aya turned her face away, unwilling to meet the older female's eyes. She did not want honour for her own sacrifices. It did not make up for the choices she had made in light of Razer's rejection. Ghia'ta had been rejected, but it had not made her love Hal Jordan any less. And it had not made her second-guess her own actions when giving her life for his. It certainly hadn't made her give up on the emotion. She had lived with her rejection, and the pain her love had given her, because it had all been part of loving another. She had _understood_ that.

Aya could not say the same.

"You will be sporting some fine worry-lines if you keep that up, child," Na'ane's voice broke her out of her thoughts, and she lifted her gaze from where she had been staring intently at her feet.

"I am sorry."

Na'ane sighed. "Do not apologize for feeling. That is no sin."

Aya said nothing to that, and her hands fiddled with the hem of the fabric that covered her form. She saw his face before her as though he was in the room with her; the pain bright in his eyes as the knife dissolved between his fingers, unable to do what had to be done to stop her. She had rejected him; had rejected them all, and yet he had not been able to go through with his mission. She had not been herself; so far had she descended into madness, anyone could have told him it was not her. Not _his_ _Aya_. And yet he had been unable to kill her.

And in return for his love, she had almost killed _him_.

She did not realize she was crying before there was a hand in front of her face, proffering a soft, crumbled piece of cloth. "Dry your eyes – this is no time for tears. You are _alive_; you should celebrate, not grieve."

Accepting the cloth, Aya pressed it against her eyes, applying more force than necessary in hopes of simultaneously wiping away the heartbroken expression on Razer's face that was like a brand on her memory. She had once shared his worst memory with him – had shared the pain that she knew still haunted him – but those memories were nothing compared to the grief on his face that had followed her departure from life in the wake of her destruction.

–_you are **alive**. _

Aya looked up, and the hand holding the handkerchief fell into her lap. Fingers curling tightly around the cloth, she raised her chin in defiance despite the tears still running down her cheeks. The Star Sapphire was right. What was she doing, weeping as though he was gone? _She_ had been the one to dissolve in his arms, not the other way around. If he was mourning her death, she was going to put a stop to it. She had not been brought back in a new body to spend her time acquainting herself with her tear-ducts and what it took to activate them.

Meeting Na'ane's curious gaze, Aya made her decision.

Pushing away from the slab, she caught the alarmed look on the Star Sapphire's face as she dropped to the floor, but before the older female could reach out to support her, Aya had already steadied herself. With measured steps, she made her way towards the entrance of the chamber, her feet carrying her forward despite her lack of knowledge of how to use them.

"And where might you be going?" she heard Na'ane ask behind her.

"The Queen is your sister, correct?" Aya asked, looking over her shoulder at her companion.

Na'ane raised a brow, amusement and confusion evident on her face. "Correct."

"Then arrange me an audience." Aya turned back to the archway before her, stepping through it with as much determination as she could muster as she set her course towards the throne room.

"I am in need of one of her portals."

* * *

He should have expected the summons from Saint Walker, and yet he had not, so caught up in his own affairs and his search for Aya that he had almost entirely forgotten about his old friend.

And he still felt 'friend' was pushing it...

It was an odd coincidence indeed that the Blue Lantern chose to contact him when he was so _conveniently_ in the near vicinity of the planet of choice, but Razer let it slide. Saint Walker was an odd character, but not wholly unpredictable. It would not have surprised him in the least to find out his fellow Lantern had kept tabs on him. He had to have known of Razer's success in driving out his rage; there were not enough Blue Lanterns in the galaxy to let one slip by unnoticed, after all.

With a sigh, he lowered himself towards the ground, easing his speed as he dropped down onto the crag jutting out from one of the many mountains covering the region. Far below him sprawled a thick forest of oddly shaped trees – not unlike the place he had first met his strange companion, he mused. It was oddly fitting for a rendezvous.

"Greetings, brother."

Turning around, Razer regarded Saint Walker with a patient smirk as he landed with nimble ease on the rock beside him. "Long time no see."

Saint Walker smiled. "Indeed." Those bottomless eyes did a quick sweep of Razer's form, and the smile widened. "It is good to see you. I am pleased at your progress."

Razer snorted, crossing his arms over his chest. "What, no lecture this time?" he teased.

Saint Walker laughed. "I do not think you need one, going by your new garb. How are you finding your new source of power?"

Turning the hand carrying his blue power ring, Razer searched for the appropriate words. "It is...different."

"Ambiguous answer, though I should not expect anything less from you."

Razer smirked, and crossed his arms again. "It has served me well, so far. Hope...does not burn." At least not the way his rage had burned. Where his old power source had been a searing flame within him, his new was of a gentler brand, though no less fierce. It was a source of strength, sustaining rather than exhausting. It was a good power; a good _change._

Something on Saint Walker's face told Razer he could easily read his thoughts, but as always, he ignored the nimble weirdo and the dark eyes regarding him. "I presume you wished to see me for a reason other than to just have a chat," he said. He had an inkling as to why, of course, but he would not be the one to bring up _that_ conversation. He knew what was expected of him; one of the few existing members of the small yet growing Blue Lantern Corps, but he had his mission, and power ring or no power ring, he wasn't about to abandon Aya, no matter how much they might need him.

Saint Walker rested his hands behind his back, and regarded Razer with an odd smile. "Do not fret, brother. I am not here to recruit you."

Razer raised a brow, not convinced. "Oh no? Then what, pray tell, is your purpose in calling me here? Was I mistaken, and you did in fact just desire a chat?"

Saint Walker laughed, but shook his head. "As much as I do enjoy talking with you, no, that was not my intention in summoning you."

"Then what was?"

His fellow Lantern smiled, and gestured to Razer's ring. "You have done much for the galaxy, Razer. Sacrificed much, perhaps more than anyone else. You achieved your objective of ridding yourself of your rage, but at a cost that was greater than the prize granted you."

Razer's brows furrowed, and he felt his shoulders tense. "You need not remind me of what I already know, Saint Walker."

Saint Walker chuckled. "Alas, I am a man of words, where you are not. Therein lies one of our greatest differences, yet it does not diminish my opinion of you. You are a good man, Razer. You deserve happiness. Hope is but a stepping-stone in your path; one that has served you well so far. And it will yet prove triumphant." His smile widened, and something about his words had a sudden surge of hope coursing through Razer that had nothing to do with his power ring.

"My purpose in calling you here was simply to relay some news I believe will make you happy to discover," Saint Walker continued, but Razer could not respond, heart firmly lodged in the base of his throat, already anticipating the next words out of his companion's mouth.

"Your Aya is alive."

* * *

AN: Good _grief_, since watching the end of 'Dark Matter' I've obsessed so much over this reunion I've succeeded in embarrassing myself with my own crazy fangirling. Yeah, that's right, embarrassing _myself_.


	3. rest, your search is over

AN: Glad to see so many are enjoying the story so far; the good feedback really kick-starts my writing, so here's another chapter for you, lovely people.

Disclaimer: I do not own Green Lantern: The Animated Series or its characters.

* * *

She found the throne room easily enough, though by the time she got there her feet were aching and she was swaying in her step, yet she stubbornly kept her back straight and her shoulders squared as she approached the Queen where she sat on her throne. In her old form, she had never stopped to consider the volumes spoken by such minute changes in an organic body; the slight tilt of a chin, or a straightened back. Robots do not _slump_, but organic beings could quite easily do so, and as she approached the graceful creature seated on the throne of Zamaron, Aya became suddenly very aware of that fact. The muscles in her back smarted, unused to the sudden strain, but she ignored the pain as she pushed forward.

She had not caught the Queen unawares, as much was clear by the fact that neither of the guards stationed on either side so much flinched at Aya's entry into the throne room. She heard the echo of footsteps behind her, and knew it was Na'ane even before she strode past her and towards her sister sitting on the throne, throwing Aya a mildly reproachful smile and a shake of her head as she passed her by.

"My Queen," Na'ane greeted with a bow at the waist, though despite the show of formality, Aya detected a hint of familiarity that contradicted what data she had gathered on communication with royalty. But considering the fact that it was her sister, she figured Na'ane was granted some leeway in her conduct towards her sovereign.

Aga'po smiled. "Elder sister. I see our...guest...has awakened at last, though what she is doing wandering the palace escapes me. Would you care to explain?" There was an edge to her words, and Aya resisted the urge to avert her gaze – an odd reflex that seemed to come quite often when she was faced with those having suffered from her past mistakes. Since her awakening she had wondered how the monarch had found it in her heart to approve of her *resurrection'. She had not considered the thought that it had been done without Aga'po's knowledge; from what she had learned of the Star Sapphires, it did not seem their way. The fact that she had awoken on Zamaron was another piece of evidence pointing towards the Queen's involvement; had it been a secret, Na'ane would have chosen to do it elsewhere.

However, regardless of her involvement, Aya would not fool herself into believing the Queen had forgotten about her attempts at destroying her world and people. She would accept whatever treatment she got; she deserved no less, for the damage her madness had caused.

Na'ane sighed. "I am afraid I underestimated her...ambition," she said, throwing Aya another strange smile, before turning her attention back to the Queen. "She requested an audience with you, my Queen. She was quite determined."

Aga'po raised a brow. "Did she now? What more does she require, after she has been granted new life? Have we not given her enough? In light of what you have done for _us_...Aya...what you have _taken_, and destroyed – I do not believe we owe you anything more. I allowed for your resurrection at my sister's request, though that does not mean I have forgotten about your deeds."

Aya said nothing, but stubbornly held the Queen's gaze. She felt her hands curl into fists at her sides – another 'unconscious' action, as Na'ane had previously explained the concept. Something raced down her spine at the look on the Queen's face. Shame? Perhaps. She was not yet wise enough in the workings of her new body to identify all the reactions provoked by her emotions.

Aga'po tilted her head. "You have done a good job, sister," she said then. "The new form...suits her."

"It was modelled after her old shell, as you well know," Na'ane said.

Aga'po had not released Aya from her cold gaze. "Which was in turn modelled after another's image, I seem to remember."

Na'ane threw a look at Aya from the corner of her eye, her brows furrowed. "That may well be, but it is hers now, do you not agree? I have completed my task; she is alive, and I have given her a body to better suit her soul, as was requested of me."

Aga'po said nothing, and when she finally looked away, Aya felt something akin to relief course through her, and had to restrain herself from physically stumbling in wake of the broken contact. "And now she wishes to speak to me."

Na'ane nodded, and looked toward Aya. "Well? You requested an audience, and you have it." She said nothing about her request for one of the Queen's portals, but then that did not surprise her. From the Queen's response, it was clear the decision to resurrect her had not been unanimously agreed upon, and she found herself wondering once again who this mysterious 'friend' was that had requested her awakening. Na'ane had said it was on behalf of Razer...

"–did give her vocal chords, I hope?" Aga'po's voice broke her out of her thoughts, and Aya looked back up at the Queen. "Or have you not yet learned how to use them?"

Aya felt something flare within her, as she had oft felt whenever her companions had doubted her abilities, and responded almost without thinking. "I know _how_."

Aga'po raised a brow. "An attitude_,_ too, hmm? Though that does not surprise me. A lesser soul than yours would not have survived the attack you unleashed upon yourself. You are stronger than your new physical form suggests, though that is true for many organic beings, as you will no doubt learn." She shifted in her seat, and crossed her legs in a sign of obvious comfort. Some of the tension seemed to drain from the room. "Now, what did you wish to ask me? I assume that is why you requested an audience?"

Aya felt the Queen 'assumed' a great deal, but kept her mouth shut on the matter. Instead she pushed her irritation back, and took a step forward. She saw the two guards tense where they stood, though what they were worried she would do was beyond her. She had none of her former powers in her new body, after all. She could barely even _walk, _but she figured they acted from a wariness borne of her invasion of Zamaron. It was not so much her form they saw, but the mind within it.

She did not know how to feel about that – whether to be pleased or distressed – but settled for channelling her focus towards what the Queen had asked of her. "Some time ago, you assisted a...companion of mine, by the use of one of your portals. I require the same assistance."

Aga'po quirked a smile. "A nice, round-about way of saying you wish to see your beloved," she mused. "Who, if I am not mistaken, is the 'companion' you speak of. You need not hide your feelings from me, child, I can read them on your face as easily I could read them on _his_."

Aya flushed at that, but said nothing, and was surprised when the Queen suddenly barked a laugh – the sound so surprising in light of her severity that Aya almost took a step back out of pure reflex. Aga'po grinned. "You frown a great deal; are you sure you did not model yourself after your beloved? From the look on your face, one should think as much."

The sudden levity threw Aya for a complete loop, and she did not know how to respond.

A hand on her shoulder snapped her quite firmly out of her distress, and Na'ane threw her an easy smile. "She only teases, child, though I do not blame you for your confusion. Some...unique brands of humour tend to escape the best of us."

"Do not start, sister," Aga'po warned, but the smile on her face betrayed her anger. "Now. _Aya._ You ask for my power, and yet I repeat my earlier question; why should I grant you this?"

Aya did not hesitate. "Because in refusing my request you would be going against the very power you serve. The power that, I _assume_, was the reason you allowed for my awakening in the first place."

Aga'po smiled. "You assume correctly. Yet do you _understand?"_

Aya frowned. "Understand?"

Aga'po leaned forward in her seat. "Yes. Do you understand why? The reason for my decreeing _your_ resurrection, when I should by rights have condemned the very thought of such blasphemy. _You,_ whose actions tore from me my dearest niece, I have granted life when I could have left you for dead. _Do you understand_ _why_?"

Something strange stirred within her at the Queen's words. A feeling she recognized, for she was nothing if not an inquisitive being to the marrow of her new synthetic bones, and she had felt this before. Having looked for answers to the universe's endless row of unanswered questions from the day of her inception, Aya could recognize the dawn of realization without effort.

"Forgiveness."

The Queen's brows rose, but she said nothing, and Aya continued, spurred on by her sudden comprehension. "It is a central aspect of the power you serve – the forgiving of the wrongs done to you and those dear to your heart. It is a...new concept, but it is not entirely unknown to me."

_There is no hate in my heart for you, Aya._

"I see," the Queen murmured, as a small smile tugged at the corners of her mouth. "Perhaps you are not so new to the ways of the universe as I believed."

Aya resisted the sudden urge to cross her arms over her chest, the way she had so often seen Razer do when someone admitted fault in his presence. _"Perhaps."_

The Queen's mouth quirked upwards even further. "My, did you have so much sass in your robotic form, or is that a new addition?"

"...sass?" Aya frowned.

The Queen waved her off with an odd laugh. "No matter." She shook her head. "Very well, I shall lend you my power." Rising from her throne, Aga'po descended the steps from the raised dais with a commanding elegance Aya suddenly found herself desperately wishing she could portray when walking, instead of the unsteady wobble with which she had previously entered the throne room.

She stood her ground until the Queen came to a stop right in front of her. "And you are...certain you do not wish to wait until you have better acquainted yourself with your new form?" She sounded dubious, and a little amused.

Aya did not hesitate. "The longer I postpone, the longer he will think I am dead." The desire to ease his hurt was fierce within her, but underlying that was another feeling – a restless desire just to _see_ _him_ again, but she was not about to admit _that_ to the Queen.

An odd smile tugged at Aga'po's lips. "Oh, I don't know about that. You should know, he has not believed you dead for one second these past few months. Did you tell her, sister?"

Na'ane returned her sister's secret smile. "The topic was not breached."

Aya blinked. "He...has not believed me dead? Why? And how do you know of this?"

Aga'po shared a look with her sister. "No particular reason. Just some news brought to us by the benefactor of your resurrection. You will see for yourself soon enough." She raised the hand holding her power ring. "Now, are you ready?"

Pushing the confusion to the back of her mind, Aya nodded, and the action felt more robotic than any she had made since her awakening. She tried loosening the muscles in her jaw, which had clenched tight without her realization – another oddity of her new organic form that she was not sure how she felt about yet.

The Queen smiled. "Then do not let me keep you." Raising the hand holding her ring, she turned her gaze to something behind Aya, and a moment later the thrum of power in the air brushed along her senses as a burst of violet light illuminated the chamber.

The portal grew, expanding wide until she could see through the violet haze to the view on the other side, and her heart did a _leap_ within her chest, seemingly into the very base of her throat–

"Razer..."

The differences that leaped out at her from the other side of the portal – the new colour of his once familiar Lantern armour and the fact that he was not wearing a helmet – were pushed forcibly to the back of her mind to be reviewed at another time, for as he spun around towards the slowly opening portal, the staggering _familiarity_ of his face – the sharp furrow of his brows over the striking blue of his eyes – overrode any other thoughts within her mind, rendering her unable to think about anything else, as though someone had tampered with her circuitry.

She was moving before she knew it, pushing herself forward and towards the portal, ignoring the fact that her legs ached and that she had not yet fully mastered her new appendages. Eyes locked intently with his through the haze of the portal, Aya pushed herself into a run. Her muscles strained violently against her commands, not yet ready for what she was putting them through, but she ignored them, and for the first time since waking Aya let her mind outrank the reflexes of her body.

* * *

"_Your Aya is alive." _

The words had barely registered before he was moving, closing the distance between them with two long strides, but if Saint Walker was surprised by the hand roughly grabbing hold of his shoulder, he did not show it. Instead he regarded Razer with the same gentle calm with which he responded to seemingly everything.

"Where?! How do you know? _Who_–"

"_At ease_, brother," Saint Walker interrupted him, placing a hand over his to ease the grip that was turning his knuckles white under his gloves, amusement brimming in his entire stance. "Though your eagerness makes me glad. It is not often I am allowed to be the bearer of such good news."

Razer opened his mouth to snap at him to _get to the point_, when his companion slipped from his grasp, disappearing in the blink of an eye, and he almost stumbled forward at the sudden loss of balance. Spinning around, he met his fellow Lantern's amused smile with a glare. "I am not up for your _games–"_

"Impatient, as always. It is good to see you have not changed entirely," Saint Walker mused. "But I apologize – I shall not stall any longer. Yet there is something you need to know–"

"That can wait._ Where is she?"_

Saint Walker raised an inquisitive brow. "Do you not wish to know of what I have to tell you?"

"Is it her? Aya? _My_ Aya?" Razer countered, ignoring Saint Walker's question.

The Blue Lantern quirked a smile. "It is, although–"

"Then that's all I need to know. Now tell me where she is!" he growled.

Saint Walker opened his mouth to respond, but stopped, and his eyes shifted to something behind Razer, before an odd smile stretched across his face. "I do not think that will be necessary."

Razer's brows furrowed sharply. "What? What is that supposed to–"

His words died on his tongue at the sudden thrum of power on the air, and recognition jumped along his veins even before the tell-tale violet tint of the Star Sapphire's power source caught the light of the midday sun, casting the lone crag in a cascade of various shades of the garish colour.

Razer spun around just as the portal began to open.

"It would appear you have found a mate that is a match for your impatience, brother," Saint Walker laughed. "I am sure I only got the news of her awakening less than two hours ago."

There was humour in his voice, but Razer wasn't listening to his companion anymore, attention caught and held solely by the slowly expanding portal before him. Rooted to the spot, he was unable to move – to so much as take a step forward. From months of hoping, searching, _scouring_ the corners of the galaxy for even the smallest hint of her presence – of her _survival –_ he was rendered helpless in the face of his sudden and unexpected success.

He couldn't move. Couldn't so much as fathom what was happening. Saint Walker had told him, but he had not been prepared to find her so soon; had not yet had the chance to come to terms with the fact that _he would see her again. _

The eyes were the first to catch his attention as he strained to see through the haze of the portal, but the fact that they looked vaguely different from the last he had seen them only briefly registered through the almost physical _shock_ of her existence that slammed into him with the force of a moving wall, and he nearly staggered back in surprise. And no sooner had he caught sight of her when a small shape came hurtling through the gateway towards him. Her movements were unlike those he was familiar with, and now the realization that _something was wrong_ managed to push its way to the forefront of his mind enough to clear it–

"_Razer!"_

The elated call of his name – _different_, too, than what he remembered – had just barely gotten through his muddled thoughts when she suddenly _tripped_, but he didn't have the chance to question how that was even _possible_ before his reflexes kicked in and he all but leaped forward to catch her before she hit the rocky ground.

Several things hit him at once when his arms closed around the small shape that had come tumbling out of the portal. The skin beneath his hands was warm, so much so that he could feel it through his gloves; the head that had struck sharply against the armour covering his sternum was covered in hair rather than the helmet he had expected – and the hands – the _hands_ that were clutching desperately at his forearms–

His mind reeled, unable to process what he was seeing before him, and his hands shook as he slowly pulled back to look at her, the lost piece of himself that he had been prepared to traverse the expanse of the whole _universe_ to find.

She grinned up at him, and the stretch of her lips formed lines at the corners of her mouth that he was certain no robotic shell, however lifelike, could never hope to imitate.

He had trouble finding his voice, let alone the words to speak, and coupled with the truth staring him in the face, however inconceivable, what he finally managed to articulate was less than a hoarse croak – the sound almost unrecognisable to his own ears, but his staggering disbelief in the face of what he was seeing did not allow for any suave words on her behalf.

Though the fact that it was indeed _her_ that he was holding was hard to swallow.

"_Aya_?"

* * *

AN: Because this story isn't just about Aya adapting to her new form. Now the real fun begins, fufu.


	4. reunited, reignited

AN: This is dedicated to **t1mco** on tumblr, for the gorgeous Razaya reunion piece.

Disclaimer: I do not own Green Lantern: The Animated Series or its characters.

* * *

"_Aya?"_

She grinned up at him, the corners of her eyes crinkling with the gesture, and Razer felt something well up within him at the sight, as the disbelief slowly trickled away into slowly dawning comprehension.

It was her, alright – there was no doubt in his mind about that. He'd know her anywhere, regardless what form she wore, but still he could not fully wrap his mind around the fact that she was..._that she was.._.

One of the small hands that were gripping his forearms to keep herself steady reached up, and he nearly recoiled in surprise at the unexpectedly warm touch as her fingers ghosted over his cheek, until her hand came to cup the side of his face. The gesture was hauntingly familiar in more than one way, but there was nothing tragic about their current embrace; she was not about to dissolve in his arms. The solidity of her form and the warm living _pulse_ he could feel leaping beneath the hands gripping her tightly was evidence enough of that.

"Hello, my love."

A choking sort of noise caught in his throat at her soft utterance, and he could only stare at her in wonder. His hands were still shaking where they held her, and the muscles in his legs strained against the unnatural crouch he had fallen into in his hurry to catch her before she fell.

"How...?" he croaked, a trembling hand releasing her shoulder to tentatively touch the side of her face – gently, as though she would vanish beneath his fingers if he applied too much pressure; evaporate in a shower of light and dust.

Aya leaned her face into the touch, and Razer sucked in a sharp breath. She smiled. "I said I would always come back for you, did I not?"

He shook his head. "But–you–" he let his gaze sweep over her shape, huddled as she was against him, from the top of her head to the bare toes now covered in dirt and grime. Shifting his weight, he rose slowly to his feet, keeping his grip around her shoulders as he focused on her feet, and the slim legs straightening as she rose with him. No robotics – no boosters for her to power her flight. Only legs, and ankles and small feet, bare and flat against the rocky surface of the crag.

He tore his eyes away with effort, meeting her curious gaze, only to find amusement swimming in her eyes. And they were the _same_ eyes, even if they were not. Almond shaped, framed with dark lashes, devoid of their former synthetic light, but _smiling_ – crinkling at the corners.

"I take it you are glad to see me?" she asked, tilting her head to the side in the same manner he remembered, and the action was so familiar – so staggeringly _dear_ – that the words had barely escaped her before he was pressing her close, burying his face in the crook of her neck with none of the restraint he had showed her in the past. Now he breathed in the life of her, clutched her to him like a precious lifeline in the bottomless chasm of deep space, unable – _unwilling_ – to let her slip from his grasp again.

"A greater exaggeration has never been uttered," came the rasp of his voice, hoarse as though he hadn't used it in years. "_Aya, _I–"

He felt her hands come up on either side of him, wrapping gently around his midsection, and he felt her chest heave as she drew a deep breath, and the action was both so alien and yet so _comforting _that he didn't know what to do with himself.

"I know," she murmured against him. "I know you never gave up."

Pulling back enough so he could meet her gaze, Razer watched as her eyes did a sweep of his form, before a smile tugged at the corners of her mouth. "You conquered your rage," she said, as she brushed a small hand over the blue plates of his armour.

Razer shook his head. "I have you to thank for that. It was through you that I found the hope I needed to purge my hate."

She shook her head, but said nothing, and he cradled her face, taking in the sight of her as every movement, however minuscule, showed him something new; the slight shift of her gaze that made her lashes brush against her cheeks, or the barest flare of her nostrils as she _breathed._ He brushed a thumb across the curve of her cheekbone, and her eyes fluttered shut.

"How are you here, Aya?"

She opened her eyes again, and opened her mouth as though to speak, before closing it, hesitation evident on her face. "It...it is hard to explain," she said finally, her shoulders slumping a little, as though not having an answer to his question was physically draining. But then, knowing her curious nature, it didn't really surprise him.

She looked over his shoulder then, towards the silent shape of Saint Walker he could still sense behind him. "I...the technicalities escape me, though I believe I have been 'resurrected'," she said then, as by way of explanation.

Razer frowned. "On Zamaron?" he asked, remembering the portal. "But...why? And..." he trailed off, unable to address the situation glaring him in the face; the organic form she had been given, he presumed, by the Zamaronians. But he could not for the life of him fathom _why_–

"You are the one to thank for this, are you not? The 'benefactor' I was told of," Aya said then, but her words were not directed at him. Razer's frown deepened, and threw a look over his shoulder at his fellow Lantern.

"_You_?" he asked.

Saint Walker smiled. "Yes, though I have been but a small cog in the great wheel of her rebirth. Her survival, along with the success of her awakening, is solely her own doing, though she may not be aware of it."

Aya frowned. "My memory is...incomplete, but I am sure I was not able to download myself after I unleashed the virus. I cannot see how–"

Saint Walker held up a hand. "You speak as though this virus was flawless, though as I have often experienced, living beings are...prone to make mistakes. Are you certain you created a _perfect_ virus?"

Aya merely stared at him, and Saint Walker continued, "A living soul since your inception, you have never possessed the infallible mind of a machine, though you may have believed as much at one time."

"I do not understand..."

Saint Walker tilted his head. "Though the virus was created to delete all versions of yourself, did you account for your own desire to _live?"_ he asked. "It is, I believe, one of the strongest desires of the heart. Strong enough, perhaps, to defy even death."

The sudden truth of his words fell like a physical weight upon the three of them, and Razer watched as Aya's eyes widened in sudden realization along with his own. It would figure, of course, that the key to her survival lay not in the strength of her robotic shell or her ability to download herself if her physical form failed her, but in the strength of mind that marked her as a living being.

The will to live in the face of death.

"I merely provided the means to ensure you a suitable form upon your awakening," Saint Walker continued. "And for that, I requested the help of an old friend, whom I believe you have met."

"Na'ane."

Saint Walker smiled. "Though she refused at first, I knew the challenge would intrigue her enough to try to convince the Queen. Mind you, it was not an easy task."

"I can believe that," Razer muttered dryly. From beside him, Aya quirked a small smile.

"So you see, Aya, this is no sole work of ours. We would have had nothing to save, if you had not first saved yourself."

Aya met Razer's gaze, and then looked back at Saint Walker. "I...had not thought it would change anything. Whether I desired to live or not...I knew what I had to do."

Saint Walker shrugged. "Alas, one may convince oneself of what one believes to be truth, whilst unaware of one's own deception. In fact, sometimes the greatest victim of one's lies is oneself. It is a well-known practice amongst near all species of the universe."

Razer tried not to flinch at the well-aimed words, but his brows furrowed in remembrance of his own deception.

_You are a machine...and I can never love you._

"Your will to live, Aya, is what overrode your decision to delete your existence from the universe. It was what kept you alive, though your army perished in wake of the virus."

Aya shook her head, as though disbelieving. "I...how did you know? That I would survive?"

Saint Walker smiled, and Razer knew what he was about to say even before the word left his mouth.

"I had hope."

He tilted his head in a gesture towards Razer. "It is the power we pledge ourselves to, and in it we find our strength. Likewise, I chose to pledge my belief in that you had found a way to save yourself. That I was not the only one to do such was not made clear to me until after I had found you."

Razer frowned. "And why did you not tell me sooner, when you knew of my search?"

Saint Walker's smile had not left him. "_Patience_, brother, is a skill honed over time, and as you well know, a core aspect of the power you now serve. I knew you would not sit still if you were told of her survival. In your search, you have learned much – that much is clear to me. Your will has only grown stronger, not weaker, and that was part of my purpose in not keeping you informed. Though the ring chose you, it is but a pretty trinket if your will is not strong enough to withstand adversity in the face of your mission."

Razer said nothing to that, for as was often the case with Saint Walker, when faced with a good point, arguing was either difficult or clean out of the question. Turning his gaze back to Aya, he let it travel the curve of her nose to the arch of her expressive brows, and the inquisitiveness of the clear blue eyes beneath them. It was not hard, thinking back to the long months of his tireless search, to remember a time where the memory of her face had been of the few things that had kept him going. He would be lying, to himself as well as Saint Walker, if he claimed he had conducted his search completely without struggle. There were nights, long and cold, where the doubt had come creeping in, but though his strength had wavered, his belief in her survival had kept him going – had kept him sane for the months she had been gone from his life.

"In the end, your search proved a success. You have come far, brother, since the day we first met," Saint Walker said then, following his declaration with a bow at the waist. "Alas, now is the hour of my departure. I trust you will be fine on your own." The last remark was uttered with a distinct teasing lilt, and Razer resisted the urge to glare.

Walking towards the edge of the crag, Saint Walker looked out across the sprawling valley below, before throwing a last glance over his shoulder towards Razer and Aya. "Welcome back, Aya. May the hope you have kindled never be extinguished. And Razer," he added, with yet another oddly knowing smile. "Good luck on your new journey. We shall no doubt meet again in not too long." And with a parting salute, he jumped, taking to the air with a flare of blue light. Razer followed the departure with his eyes until he was but a speck high in the atmosphere, before turning his attention back to the small shape at his elbow.

A breeze passed over the crag, and he caught her sudden shiver as it raced through her, before her hands shot up to rub at her arms. She blinked, noticing the small bumps below her fingers. "What...?"

Razer frowned. "You are cold," he said, also taking notice of the thin fabric of the white shift that barely covered her. He averted his gaze just as she looked up to meet it.

"The temperature is indeed different than on Zamaron," she said, rubbing at her arms, brows furrowed in obvious discontent.

Razer nodded, and sighed, knowing what he had to do though he would have preferred otherwise. Lifting the hand holding his power ring, he breathed deeply, knowing also that he was probably going to regret it, before sending out the signal. Knowing Hal, he would not waste time if he could help it, and he had told Razer to give him a call if he ever needed anything. In the meantime, they would just have to wait. Stepping closer, he wrapped his arms around her shoulders, and she sighed, letting her forehead rest against the armoured plates of his chest as she huddled closer.

It did not take long before his ring thrummed – they must not have been far when he'd made the call. A moment later, a familiar yet disembodied voice reached their ears, loud in the silence that had settled between them.

"_The heck are you doing on a backwater planet like this, Razer? You forgot to recharge or something?" _

Razer rolled his eyes. "Not quite. I called to make a...request. Any chance you could pick us up with the Interceptor_?"_

The comm crackled. _"Us? What, did you go and find new friends on your adventures? I'm hurt." _Hal's laughter drifted out to them, and Aya smiled at the sound. Razer shook his head; Hal never changed. _"Nah, I'm just kidding. Sure, I'll come pick you up. How many are we talking about here? You got a whole new club or something?"_

Razer sighed, but a smile tugged at his lips. "Only _one."_

Hal was silent on the other line for a long moment. _"Wait. Razer, you're not saying–"_

"–_whaddaya stalling for, Jordan? We gonna pick up Red or what?" _Kilowog's voice overrode Hal's query, and Razer rolled his eyes, wondering if he shouldn't have just taken Aya away on his own. He'd almost – _almost_ – found himself missing his former crew in his months of travelling alone, but now he was quickly regretting even making the call. But Aya did not have her old powers in her...new body, and would require another form of transportation. The Interceptor was the logical choice.

And, he figured, grudgingly, Hal and the bolovaxian would no doubt be glad to see her again.

"_Razer?" _

Slim fingers curled around his, and Razer started, still not used to the feeling. Aya grinned up at him, and despite his growing irritation, he felt a smile tug at his lips in return. Closing his hand around hers, he held the one carrying his ring towards her in silent acquiescence.

"Green Lantern Hal," she began, her smile widening as she spoke. "This is Aya, requesting permission to board the Interceptor. Do you copy?"

No sound reached them from the other side, and Aya looked up at Razer in confusion. Had the connection broken?

Then, _"...say that again?"_

"Is your translator not working or are you being purposefully dense? She asked you a question."

The comm crackled again, but it was not Hal's voice that drifted out from the other end. _"Red, you...you found Aya?!" _

Looking down at the creature in question, Razer smirked. "Not exactly," he retorted, and at the confused quirk of her brows, his smirk widened.

"_I_ was not the one doing the finding."

* * *

They watched the familiar sleek shape of the Interceptor as she descended towards them; the sight of her sending a thrum of longing through Aya's veins, and she realized suddenly how long it had been since she had stepped aboard the ship – her old home.

Razer stood beside her, a silent pillar in the wake of everything that had happened since she'd passed through the portal from Zamaron. There was a galaxy of unanswered questions between them still, yet neither of them had said anything in their wait for the arrival of the others. Content for the moment in each other's company and the knowledge that they were together, they needed nothing else. He was not a man of many words, as she well knew, but the hand curled protectively around hers spoke volumes where his voice did not.

She saw the hatch to the hull open up, followed by the familiar, green-clad shapes of her old companions as they exited the ship. Razer's hand tightened around hers, and she gripped it back with as much strength as she could muster. Worry crawled in her stomach at the thought of how they would react to her change, and the sudden thought that they would not like what they saw made her stomach do a strange _roll_ that made it feel as though something was about to force its way up without her permission.

"Relax," came the low rumble from beside her, and she drew another deep breath.

"I worry."

"You need not."

But even as he spoke the words, she wondered. He had not broached the subject after Saint Walker's revelation, and she wondered why. He had asked no more questions; had made none of the queries she would have thought natural for anyone to ask in light of her acquiring a new body. An _organic_ body; not just the robotic parts with which she had clad herself in the past. She was determined to bring the subject up the next time they were alone, but for the moment pushed her sudden insecurities about Razer to the back of her mind in favour of those towards the Green Lanterns approaching them at top speed.

"Aya!"

Raising her free hand, Aya waved, as she had seen done by many in similar situations, and despite her concern she felt something warm kindle within her at the sight of Hal Jordan's elated grin as he landed on the crag before them, closely followed by his trusted partner. And Aya had not even had the chance to open her mouth before a pair of great arms whisked here away from Razer, pulling her into a rough embrace as Kilowog hoisted her up and off the ground.

"Kiddo! I can't believe you're _back_!"

And quite without her knowing how she produced the sound, laughter bubbled up within her to tumble off her tongue as she was crushed against the bolovaxian, who spun her around with an eagerness she had not known she had missed–

She felt him halt mid-spin at the sound, and knew the moment realization dawned on him even before he lifted her at arm's length in order to have a better look at her.

The sight of his brow shooting towards his hairline looked quite comical, though she kept the thought to herself, and tried not to avert her gaze as Kilowog regarded her as though sometime during his hug, she had been replaced with someone else.

"Kid...what..."

"She has been given an organic body," Razer spoke up then, saving her the trouble of explaining, for which she was glad. A lump of sorts had formed in the base of her throat, and she tried to swallow over it, but it pushed back. It was only through sheer will that she was able to keep the tears from welling up in her eyes, though it was no easy task.

Kilowog blinked, though he did not take his eyes off her. "A _what_?"

"What, so...lungs, heart, blood – the works?" Hal cut in, stepping into Aya's line of vision where she was still held up and at arm's length by the large bolovaxian. He whistled.

"Wait, wait, wait, wait. Hold _on_! You're..._organic_, Aya?" Kilowog asked, brows still furrowed over his sharp eyes as he had another thorough look at her. And quite for the first time since waking, Aya felt oddly exposed.

A blue-gloved hand closed over one of Kilowog's forearms then, and she looked down with a start to see Razer glare at him. "You can put her _down_ now, Seargeant."

Something stirred within Aya at that, and she felt heat rise to her cheeks again – a reflex she was growing to dread, as she appeared to have seemingly no control over it.

"Well excuse _me _for wanting to have a look at her! It's a bit much to take in, and we can't all react with that 'Blue Lantern calm' mumbo-jumbo you're always sprouting." With a grumble, Kilowog put Aya back down on her feet, and the sudden change in equilibrium almost had her falling over. Thankfully, the bolovaxian had good reflexes, and steadied her even before Razer had a chance to reach her.

"Whoa, easy, kiddo!"

"I am quite alright," Aya replied as she tried to steady herself, "I am simply having minor difficulties with my new appendages."

"It _is_ quite the transformation," Hal commented as he stepped around Kilowog to look at her, arms crossed over his chest in the comfortable manner she remembered. An easy grin broke out across his face. "I like it. It suits you, Aya."

She couldn't have hid the smile if she'd wanted to, nor could she ignore the surge of relief within her at his approval. "Thank you...Hal."

He laughed. "What, no title this time?"

She blushed. "I am...growing accustomed to familiarity. Vocal chords allow for a greater spectre of...nicknames, as you would call them. And I am no longer just your nav-computer."

Hal's eyes softened at that. Uncrossing his arms, he reached out to grasp her shoulder in a fierce grip, showing none of the tentative care Razer had earlier. "You were _never_ just a nav-computer, Aya. I hope you know that."

She smiled up at him, and nodded, feeling some of her nervousness dissipate at the ease with which he handled the situation. She had been afraid they would reject her upon discovering her change, or that they hadn't forgiven her for what she'd put them through during the war.

But though both obviously had more questions for her, the smiles on their faces were those of companions welcoming back a friend – a _comrade_. The strange unease in her stomach seemed to settle a bit at their acceptance, and she released the breath she had not been aware she had been holding.

"Well, I can't be the only one with questions," Hal said, and nodded towards the ship. "I say we get back to the Interceptor and celebrate. What do you say, Aya? It'll be like a birthday party...sorta."

Aya grinned. "I would like that."

Hal returned the smile. "Then it's settled! Come on, Kilowog, I need you to check if we've got any of that sparkling stuff stashed away still, and..." his voice drifted out of earshot as he drifted back towards the ship, Kilowog beside him. The bolovaxian threw Aya a glance over his shoulder, accompanied by a smile and a nod, before gruffly retorting to what Hal was saying. Aya turned her attention back to Razer behind her, watching the departure of their friends with a grave look on his face.

She frowned. "You are quiet. Is all well?"

His smile was tired, but he nodded. "Yes. This...it is all a lot to take in, Aya."

She walked towards him, almost shyly. "Not too much, I hope?"

She must have said something wrong, because the moment the last word left her lips his hand made a grab for hers, tugging her towards him with enough force to make her stumble, but he caught and steadied her, wrapping her in his arms without a shred of his earlier care. Pressing his forehead against hers, Razer breathed, and Aya was frozen against him, caught in the sudden and unexpected show of vulnerability from the man who had kept stoically silent for the better part of the last half-hour.

"_Never," _he growled suddenly, the harsh quality of his voice a direct contrast to the shaking hands holding her to him. "Do not _ever_ say that. You are _everything_, Aya, but you have never been too much."

She released a choking breath. "I am...glad."

Pulling away to look at her, their eyes met, and her heart leaped within her chest as anticipation shot down her spine. One of his thumbs traced the line of her cheekbone, as he had done before, but it was not with fascination this time as it was with...something else...something she could not identify, but she was vividly reminded of the time he had given her the flower when she had followed him to his old home on Volkreg...

Her eyes fluttered shut quite of their own volition as he leaned forward, tilting her head up and tangling his fingers in her hair–

"_C'mon lovebirds, or we'll start celebrating without you! You can do that gushy schmushy crap later. Preferably in a room. Whoa, wait. Scratch that. Separate rooms for the both of you! And don't go getting any ideas now, Razer. You listening to me? Don't make me come over there–" _

Razer sighed as Hal's rant crackled through the comm, leaning his forehead heavily against hers. Releasing her chin, he rubbed the bridge of his nose, no doubt irritated at the interruption, but the smile he gave her was nothing like the one he had given her on Volkreg. There was no resignation now, only humour; yet another testament of his conquered rage.

"Welcome home, Aya," he said instead, lifting one of her hands to place a kiss to it that had her heart thrumming so loudly against her ribcage she was sure the others could hear it back on the ship.

"_Razer, I'm warning you–"_

"It is alright, Hal," Aya cut him off, though never breaking contact with the gaze holding hers. Pushing her disappointment to the back of her mind, she laced her fingers with his. The unease in her stomach was gone, replaced by something else – a fluttering, like the beat of a hundred tiny wings. She grinned, and Razer returned it with a quirk of his own lips.

"We are coming home now."

* * *

AN: I have as good as sold my soul to this pairing. And papa!Hal, if they make a second season I request heaps and _heaps_ of your doubtless cute over-protectiveness.


	5. sleep, child, and dream

AN: As my holidays are now over, updates will not be as quick as before, but I will try my best not to take too long between new chapters. On another note, **thank you so much **for all the positive feedback on this! There are many reasons to love this fandom, and _you_ are one of them. Your reviews have succeeded in brightening long days buried in coursework and linguistic journals, and I am forever in _awe_ of all the gorgeous art some of you have produced! (Yeah **t1mco**, **mrsgingles,** **mmemento**, **jinxjayjess** and **arty-fart** on tumblr, I'm referring to you guys. Go check them out!)

Disclaimer: I do not own Green Lantern: The Animated Series or its characters.

* * *

"So let me get this straight," Hal began, crossing his arms over his chest as he leaned back in his chair. "You made a flawed virus, and then Weird-'n-Nimble got help from _Zamaron,_ of all places, to give you a new organic body. Which is why you woke up there, fresh-faced and with a beating heart etcetera etcetera, before you got a hike from the Queen's purple voodoo-powers and smack-landed yourself right in Razer's lap–"

He stopped mid-word, and held up a hand. "I did not almost say that. Forget that last part. What I _meant_ was: you took a portal-dive and found Mr. Calmness of the Lake over there. And now you're...here. And alive. Er, aliv_-er,_ than, you know, _before."_

Razer sighed, but Aya caught the minuscule quirk of the lips that betrayed his attempted exasperation. For her part, she was curious as to what Hal had wanted her to forget and why, but for once, she kept her questions to herself. Flexing her legs in front of her, she leaned back into the couch.

"That 'about sums it up', as I believe you would say," she said, once a lull had settled. Twiddling with the glass in her hands, Aya watched the golden liquid as it swirled behind its clear confines. Apparently, it was a custom on Earth to drink strange bubbly drinks during celebrations, and though she had not yet made herself taste it – she had just recently mastered breathing; _ingesting_ was still a little way off – she appreciated the gesture more than the actual drink. She had been concerned they would not welcome her back at all, and that they had not just done that but chosen to _celebrate_ it as well...

Raising her eyes from the glass, she found Razer looking at her, brows furrowed in concern, and she tried to smile – the way some organic beings did to communicate that they were alright, as her research into facial expressions had taught her. He said nothing to that, but shifted in his seat, not noticeably closer, but her mouth quirked upwards quite without her help as his shoulder brushed against hers.

Kilowog drained a tankard of something Aya was sure was _not_ bubbly liquid, before wiping his mouth with his sleeve. "It's a pretty unbelievable story, kiddo. Coming back from the dead!" He shook his head. "And here I thought Jordan had dibs on the harebrained escapes."

"She did not _die,"_ Razer said. "As I told you before, and as Saint Walker confirmed."

Kilowog waved him off. "Yeah, yeah. It's still pretty amazing, I say. And the Queen of Zamaron, a part of it! If there was anyone else telling me, I wouldn't have believed it. Gal wasn't very fond of robots from what I remember."

Aya shifted the glass from one hand to the other, and stared at her fingers; the intricate lines and furrows, and the shift of the bones beneath the skin – something she felt she would never grow tired of observing. "The Queen...had her reasons," she said at length, raising her eyes and meeting Kilowog's.

Something in her voice must have betrayed her reluctance, because the great bolovaxian shifted in his seat, clearly uncomfortable. He cleared his throat. "Well, uh...good. I ain't gonna be ungrateful for a good deed."

Aya smiled. "I owe her much. Is that not how you say it?" she asked, looking from Kilowog to Hal Jordan.

Hal leaned back in his seat. "From what I can tell, we _all_ owe her." He smiled. "It's good to have you back, Aya. It hasn't been the same without you."

Kilowog snorted. "That's for sure. How many AI's have we gone through now? Heck, even Lamo seemed a pretty good choice after that last one! Swear that one was trying to kill us, the faulty bugger. Ultrawarped us to all _kinds_ of places–"

"What the Seargeant is trying to say is that you have been missed," Razer cut him off. "And not just as an operating system." He shot Kilowog a look, to which the bolovaxian grinned sheepishly.

"Ah, yeah. Sorry, kiddo. You know how it is–"

Aya smiled. "I do not mind. I would like to hear what you have been up to, while I have been gone."

Hal grinned, and was about to open his mouth when Kilowog held up a hand. "Oh _no._ No, Jordan. _I'm_ doing the talking – if I let you open your mouth we'll never hear the end of it!"

"Hey, _I'm_ the better storyteller," Hal retorted. "Ask anyone and they'll tell you. You always focus on the _wrong_ things. No one wants to hear you read a bloody mission report; they want the dangerous stuff, the suspense, the daring escapes!"

Kilowog snorted, crossing his great arms over his chest. "I'd like to see you _write_ a mission report for once. Then again, you're always so busy getting us into _trouble_–"

"–which _always_ makes for the best stories, and you know it," Hal cut in with a charming grin.

"–and leaving _me_ to deal with the dirty work!" Kilowog glared at him, and Hal laughed.

Aya smiled as she watched them bicker, comforted by the familiar sight and the sound of their voices. After boarding the Interceptor Hal had ushered them all into the bridge for the celebration, and had proffered various edible oddities Aya had recognized as human-made but like the drink in her hand, had yet to touch. Their dynamics as a crew had been pleasantly familiar, and they had fallen into routine surprisingly fast, considering the circumstances. It was soothing, almost, just watching her companions interact, knowing that she was _home_–

She blinked suddenly, and frowned, shaking her head to clear it. For a moment, everything had seemed oddly hazy. It was almost reminiscent of her yellow crystal vulnerability, but it felt different, somehow. Blinking again, she swayed a bit in her seat, and shook her head. Now that she was aware of it, she felt...drained, as though she was running low on power. Odd.

"Aya?"

She looked up to find three pairs of eyes watching her with concern. Meeting Razer's gaze, she was about to open her mouth to tell them she was alright when a sudden urge to inhale air suddenly seized her, and her mouth stretched open quite without her own volition. Panic raced through her at her sudden lack of control, and she clapped her hands over her mouth just as her lungs exhaled their release. The concerned looks from the others had changed to expressions of surprise, and Aya felt a blush creep into her cheeks. She sat very still, as though any sudden movements on her part would trigger the strange reaction again.

Finally, she spoke, her voice muffled from behind her hands. "I...do not know what just happened. I apologize."

The others were silent for another moment, before Kilowog snorted a laugh, and a grin broke across Hal's face. Confused, Aya looked towards Razer, and was surprised to find even him trying to hide a smile. "What–"

"It's called a 'yawn', kid. Weird reflex for some organic beings. Don't ask – no one knows why we do it."

Aya frowned. "A...yawn?"

Hal grinned. "Feeling tired, Aya?"

She caught Razer's frown out of the corner of her eye, and turned towards him with a quizzical look, wondering if perhaps he could explain. "How long as it been since you awoke?" he asked, and seemed to be trying to have a closer look at her eyes.

Aya looked towards the monitor that displayed the time, and did the rough calculation in her head. "By my estimation..sixteen hours." And that was when it struck her.

Organic beings required sleep to function.

"Oh."

Razer's gaze softened, but Hal spoke up before he could. "It's nothing to worry about – we all need sleep at some point. Now that you're, eh..._changed_, you can have your own quarters. Wanna go have a rest? Might do you good."

Razer nodded his consent. "You should not push yourself too hard; it is only your first day."

Hal nodded towards the door to the crew's quarters. "You probably know this girl's layout better than any of us, but Razer can show you which room you'll be using. There should be new sheets...I think."

Kilowog snorted. "You _think_?"

"When was the last time we had someone aboard again?" Hal scratched the back of his head.

Kilowog sighed. "If there ain't any new sheets, I'll show ya where to find 'em. Can't even leave simple tasks to you, Jordan, and this is supposed to be 'your' ship."

"Hey, I pull my weight around here. So I don't change the sheets on the bunks. What–"

"Would you like me to show you?"

The question drew her away from the bickering duo in front of her, and Aya looked up at Razer. She smiled. "If it is not too much trouble."

His lips quirked at that, but he said nothing as he rose from his seat, taking her glass from her and placing it down along with his own. He waited for her to get up before moving towards the doors at the back of the bridge. Aya trailed after him, her steps soft against the cool steel floors. Her feet had been stuffed into a pair of Hal's old 'socks', as he had called them, and though they were much too large, Aya had not complained. She had been quite cold when she'd stepped aboard the ship, after all, and it was a pleasant gesture, albeit strange.

"Hey, you two," Hal called after them as they reached the door, pausing in his conversation with Kilowog to send them a warning glance, although _why_, Aya could not fathom. "No shenanigans now, you hear? I'm expecting you back here in ten minutes, Razer."

Razer rolled his eyes. "Duly noted," he retorted dryly. Stepping towards the doors, they hissed open, and Aya threw another confused glance over her shoulder at Hal as she followed Razer into the confines of the ship.

"What did he mean by 'shenanigans'?" she asked as they continued down the corridor.

Razer sighed. "Nothing of importance. He...jokes, as you well know."

She said nothing to that, and followed him in silence until they came to a row of doors she knew led into the crew's quarters. Razer motioned for the one furthest down the hallway. "I believe this is the one." Pressing a hand against the sensor on the wall, the doors slid open to allow them entry, but Razer remained where he stood.

Aya took a step forward into the room, and the lights overhead flickered on upon detecting her presence. At the far end was a simple bunk, but otherwise the room was empty of any superficial additions.

Razer walked past her then, and she blinked, tilting her head as she watched him tug at the soft coverlet on the bunk. After a quick inspection, he straightened, and turned towards her. "It would appear they have not had guests for some time. The sheets are clean." There was a wry lilt to his tone, and Aya quirked a smile, though she was finding it hard searching for something to say. It was dawning on her that he was about to leave, and she had a sudden, violent urge to beg him to stay.

"Ra–"

"I should–"

They stopped, and Aya averted her gaze. She wrung her hands against the hem of her shift almost unconsciously, but said nothing more. Razer sighed, before a smile tugged at his lips, and he reached out towards her. Her heart leaped into her throat, but he simply slid his hand behind her neck, pulling her forward to place a kiss to her forehead. "Goodnight, Aya," the low rumble reached her ears. Then he released her and turned to leave, fingers trailing against her jaw before he let his hand fall to his side.

"Wait!"

She didn't know what came over her, but before her mind had had a chance to react, she had reached out, catching the hand with one of her own. Razer turned around, surprise evident on his face, and she swallowed, suddenly faced with the fact that she did not know why she had just done as she had. It had been like a reflex, and she had acted quite without thinking. All she had known was that she had not wanted to be left alone; had not wanted _him_ to leave.

And then there was the fact that...she did not know how organic beings went about starting their sleep cycles.

"I...I do not know how."

He frowned, and turned fully towards her, though he made no move to remove her hand from his. "You do not know how...?"

Aya averted her gaze. "How to...sleep," she said, and felt oddly embarrassed. But then they had found it amusing when she had not known what a 'yawn' was...

Razer's gaze softened, and he smiled. "It requires little effort. Just let your mind drift. Allow it to rest, and your body will follow."

Her brows pulled together. "Drift?"

He mimicked her expression, and seemed to contemplate the query. "It is...like turning it off, if that terminology is more helpful."

"Turn it...off?" Her mind? Was that possible? She had never known a moment, outside of having her system hacked, where she had not been alert – had not been 'awake'.

Razer nodded. "It is a natural habit of most organic beings; you will get the hang of it soon enough. Your new...body, will require rest. A cycle of eight hours is common for most beings, though some require less."

She nodded. "I am aware. I know the sleep cycles of this entire crew."

Razer smirked. "Yes, I imagine you would."

She said nothing to that, and he lifted the hand holding his, placing a kiss to it as he had done on the crag earlier. "Sleep well, Aya. I will see you in the morning." Letting the hand drop, he turned, and the doors slid open to let him out. Aya did not move from where she stood, but followed him with her eyes until the doors closed behind him, separating them.

"Goodnight...Razer."

Turning towards the bunk, Aya wrung her hands against the fabric of her shift. Then with a deep breath, she moved towards it, lifting the covers away and slipping beneath them. The lights dimmed almost immediately, and she jumped a bit at the sudden gloom, before curling further beneath the coverlet. She felt oddly small and exposed, and tugged the sheet closer to her neck, averting her eyes from the ceiling above her.

Closing her eyes, she remembered Razer's words and tried shutting off her mind – tried letting it 'drift'. _Your body will follow. _All she had to do was relax. She _was_ tired; could feel it in her muscles, new as they were. She turned over on her back, but quickly changed her mind and rolled back over on her side until she was staring into the wall. Closing her eyes again, she tried to relax her muscles, and realized her hands were clutching the blanket tightly enough to make her knuckles appear through the skin.

She shook her head in another attempt to clear it, but it helped little. She could not find comfort; could not make her mind 'drift'. Everything was so quiet. _Too quiet._ She could not hear anything but her own breathing and the shift of the blankets as she turned over again and again. She could not hear the others at all; not their heartbeats, or the sound of their breathing. She did not even know where they were on the ship – could only assume from what Hal had said, that they would stay on the bridge for a while longer.

Her palms felt clammy, and she wiped them furiously on the blankets, still unused to the exuding of moisture her new body did quite of its own volition. Turning over again, she burrowed her face into the pillow, as though to forcibly shut out the loudness of the silence that seemed to press down on her like a physical weight. As an operating system, she had never felt alone. She had been able to hear everything that had gone on around her, from her immediate proximity to the furthest reaches of the Interceptor – the lightest footstep to the sound of someone turning over in their sleep. Now, there was nothing. There was only her, and the silence, and the dark room.

And she had never felt more alone.

Even straining her ears, she could not make out their voices. Not even Hal's laughter was discernible through the walls separating the crew's quarters from the bridge. Curling in on herself, Aya tugged the blankets over her head, burrowing further into the bunk. Sleep seemed an impossible feat, and her mind would not rest. Now that she had been given peace, with nothing else to distract her, memories and impressions of the day replayed before her mind in a continuous loop. Waking up, the audience with the Queen, going through the portal, Razer. Waking up, the audience with the Queen, going through the portal, _Razer– _

She wondered if he had begun his sleep cycle yet. In her old form she would have been able to tell; a simple scan of his vital signs would have shown her. And for all his words of letting the mind drift, Aya distinctly remembered Razer spending more time awake than asleep.

She did not know how much time had passed since she had retired to her new quarters, but when she turned around, the small monitor in the wall read a good two hours past midnight. The others had doubtless retired as well by now, though she had heard no movement in the corridor. Closing her eyes, she attempted again to shut off her mind; to not focus so much on what was going on around her, and not straining her ears for sounds she would not be able to hear no matter how hard she tried. She just had to–

–_what have I done?_

She shook her head free of the errant memory, brows pulling down in reflex as the image pushed its way to the front of her mind. If only she could–

–_no hate in my heart for you, __**Aya**__–_

–_a computer virus–_

Pressing her hand against her brow, she rubbed against the skin, as though it would help. As though it would wipe her mind _clean–_

–_you are a __**machine,**__ and I can never– _

Throwing the blankets off, she sat up, clenching her hands into fists to keep them from shaking. Pressing her fists against her temples, she breathed in, and out. The temperature in the room was comfortable, yet she felt _cold,_ and freezing moisture had broken through her skin and out across her upper back. She shivered, but regarded the blanket on the floor warily, feeling suffocated just by looking at it. Burying her face in her hands, she drew another heavy breath.

This was not working.

Looking towards the door, and then the monitor on the wall blinking softly in the darkness, Aya made her decision. Slipping off the bunk, she removed the coverings on her feet, placing them on the disarrayed sheets before making her way towards the door, chin raised and shoulders set resolutely.

She hoped he was awake.

* * *

He could not find sleep.

With an impatient sigh, Razer shifted over on his back, gaze finding the darkened light-sources running like veins through the ceiling – a familiar sight even after his time away from the Interceptor. Insomnia was an old friend, and he had spent many nights studying the finer details of the ceiling above his bunk.

He should have been able to find rest. Now that Aya was back, safe and sound and _alive_, sleep should not be eluding him. And yet it was as elusive as stardust, slipping through his fingers even as he tried to grasp it–

–_is too late, my love. It has **already been done**. _

The memory leaped to the front of his mind, brought about no doubt, by his ill-fitting analogy. Clenching his eyes shut against the image burned to his memory, Razer pinched the bridge of his nose. His weary body longed for rest, but fear was still a sharp taste on his tongue, preventing him from finding peace of mind. Fear that he would wake in the morning and she would be _gone;_ not a trace of her left. Dissolved. _Like stardust. _

Turning back over on his side, Razer tried to push all thoughts away from his mind – tried to remember all the exercises Saint Walker had taught him when he had first sought the help of the Blue Lanterns. Sleep had been easier since he had purged his rage and achieved his new power ring, but some nights his memories would not allow him rest. Not even the calmness of the lake would help him tonight.

The sound of someone touching the monitor outside his quarters reached his ears the moment before the doors hissed open, and he whirled around, alert and searching out the intruder even before the light from the hallway spilled into the dark room. He blinked against the glare, wondering if his vision was deceiving him, or if he was indeed dreaming.

"Aya?"

The doors slid shut behind her, casting the room in darkness once more, yet she remained where she was, shifting her weight from foot to foot in a distinct yet unfamiliar show of...shyness. Razer frowned. "What–"

"I–" she began, and then stopped, averting her gaze. "I could not sleep. My mind will not rest. And..." she trailed off, letting the sentence hang heavy between them.

Razer's gaze softened. He should have known it would not come easy. A day was not enough, even for someone like her, to adapt to a form that brought with it a whole lot more complications than her robotic shell ever had. He did not for a moment think it was the technicalities of falling asleep that eluded her, but did not press the matter. Instead he did the first thing that popped into his mind.

Lifting the blanket that covered his form, he shifted his weight until the cold metal of the wall brushed against his back, allowing for room on the mattress next to him. The gesture was unmistakable, and he could see recognition as it passed across her face, mingling with her surprise. He considered for a moment the many ways Hal would find to main him if he were to discover, but the longing was sharp within him and she was _there,_ and solid and _alive_, and he found that he would endure all of Hal's wrath just for the knowledge that he would wake to find her _still there. _

For a moment she remained where she stood, staring at the open space, but then she took a tentative step forward, followed by another, until she was beside the bunk. She did not meet his eyes, but with the awkward movements of someone who has never done such a thing in their life, she slipped in, curling herself up against him as he drew the cover over her small form.

They fumbled a bit in finding a comfortable solution to the limited space of the bunk, but though it was a little awkward, they made it work. It had been years since he had shared a bed with someone, but where he had often thought it would feel wrong to break the life of solitude he had adopted after Ilana's death, the warm, solid form snug against his side felt anything _but_. Pulling her closer, he pressed his nose to the crown of her head and the soft strands of hair that he was still getting used to, and breathed.

"I apologize for intruding on your rest," came the soft utterance from somewhere below his chin, and he felt her lips move against the skin of his collarbone.

Razer snorted softly. "I believe that is something one says _before_ the actual intrusion," he retorted wryly, a smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth.

Aya shifted a little against him, a hand splaying against the skin of his stomach with the tentative care of the completely inexperienced. It was oddly endearing. "Sleep was...more difficult that you made it out to be," she murmured, her voice almost too low for him to catch.

Razer was silent a moment, listening to her breathing, attention caught and held by the feel of her hand against his ribcage – she could not seem to decide where to put it. She was silent now; her head heavy on his chest. He sighed.

"It can be, sometimes," he said at length, after the silence had grown long.

Aya hummed. "Were you...unable...to find...rest..."

The words trailed off into nothing, and Razer raised a brow, inclining his head to look at her, and nearly chuckled as he found her already asleep. Her breathing had slowly evened out, and the hand she had not known where to place was limp against his stomach.

He smiled into her hair. "Not anymore," he murmured. Focusing his whole attention on the soft, even breaths of her new lungs and the steady _thump_-_thump_ of the heart that was but an organic supplement to one she had always had, Razer closed his eyes...

...and slept.

* * *

AN: Hal's gonna be _so_ pleased. And as much as I enjoy a good smut-story, there will (sadly) not be any in this. Apologies to those of you who've asked for it, but alas, you must find your fix elsewhere. Though I do hope the story is/will be enjoyable regardless!


End file.
